I had some bread and coffee with the firefighters in the morning and I was back on the road. It was a tough day for me. I didn’t have to cover a huge amount of distance to get to Tacloban, but the traffic was very bad and I was just about going out of my mind by the end of the day. And when I arrived in Tacloban, I was quite frazzled. On the way, I’d been hit with another one of those massive rainstorms. This time, I took it seriously and I put on my rain covers in preparation. Even so, I made it just in time. I kept delaying doing it and the rain started to come down hard before I’d finished. This was the first time I’d put on all four rain covers, too, and I didn’t have a system in place. I was also caught out in the open, so even though my pannier bags were covered, I was not. I just stood there in the rain and got thoroughly drenched. It really didn’t matter, though. Before the rain started, I was completely soaked in sweat. From that point of view, the rain was a welcome relief. I stood there in the rain and let it soak my shirt and pants. Then I’d wring out the water and let it get soaked again. I imagined I was cleaning my clothes a little bit in this way. It also cooled me off. Eventually I felt quite chilled, and I enjoyed shivering there in the rain and wind.

Before Tacloban, I crossed over the San Juan Straight on the San Juanico Bridge. This bridge was 2.6 kilometers long and gave beautiful views of the strait and the mountains and the nearby villages. Because of the heavy traffic, I didn’t dare ride my bike on the narrow road. I lifted my bike up onto the small sidewalk and walked my bike along. It was a great way to absorb my surroundings.

Tacloban was busy and choked with traffic, like all the towns I’d encountered. I struggled mentally and physically as I made my way around. I also had no luck when it came to finding a place to stay. It appeared that there was a big training session for teachers in town and every single hotel had been fully booked for them. I rode my bicycle from place to place to place only to be told at each one that they were full. I eventually gave up and stopped at a lovely coffee shop for a break – a break I sorely needed. Then I was back on the road and riding all over town stopping at every hotel, pension house, and lodging house I could find. They were all very expensive and all completely full. At one point, I found myself down by the waterfront area and I saw a government building for “Consular Affairs.” I asked if I could extend my tourist visa there, but they said that was done at a different building. I got some random directions from them and set off. I had to ask a few more times for directions, but I eventually spotted the immigration building sitting on top of a small hill right across from the Lion’s Club on the water on Magsaysay Street. I had intended to go to the immigration office on Monday. I was tracking it down only to figure out in advance where it was located. But since I was there, I thought I might as well check it out. I rode my bike up the steep driveway and went inside. There, I was told by the senior officer – a friendly fellow in jeans and a casual shirt – that they could give me my extension right then. It was nearly closing time and the cut-off point for the day had long since passed, but they could still do it. It would only take ten or fifteen minutes. I didn’t have enough cash in pesos, but the man offered to change US dollars for me. He made a small profit on the transaction, of course, but it was only fair. I filled out a simple form, handed over my passport and 7,350 pesos, and just ten minutes later, I had a 2-month visa extension stamped in my passport.

I was very glad to get this visa extension so easily and so effortlessly, but that only mildly offset the pain of paying such a high fee. The Philippines as a nation is in love with making up fees for various things and they really went crazy when it came to extending tourist visas. Here is a complete list of all the fees I had to pay in pesos:

Monthly Extension Fee: 1,000

Head Tax: 250

Emigration Clearance Certificate: 700

Monthly Extension Application Fee: 300

Alien Certificate of Registration: 1,000

Certificate Fee: 500

ACR I-Card Fee: 2,075

Legal Research Fee: 50

Express Lane Fee: 1,000

Express Lane Fee (Certification): 500

 

Grand Total: 7,375 ($184)

As I handed over this vast amount of money, I felt like a complete chump. What kind of an idiot pays this much money just for a tourist visa extension? Well, every single person who wants to stay in the Philippines longer than 59 days has to pay this fee, so that makes all of us complete idiots. I actually felt embarrassed for myself as I paid this inflated and insane fee. What must these immigration people think of us idiots who hand over all that cash? Of course, we have no choice except to not come to the Philippines at all.

I knew that the visa extension fee was expensive before I came to the Philippines, but it didn’t really hit home until I landed here and looked up the official figures online. If I had to do it all over again, I think I’d have moved a bit faster and gotten out of the Philippines before my current visa expired. The Philippines has turned out to be quite a bit more expensive than I expected. Add these outrageous visa extension fees, and it becomes even more expensive.

Just look at the crazy and nonsensical items in the list. There is an “emigration” fee. But I’m not emigrating. I’m a tourist. Why should I have to pay that?

There’s an Alien Certificate of Registration fee. But right after that there is a “Certificate Fee.” Call me crazy, but those seem like the exact same thing. Why two fees?

Then there is the ACR I-Card Fee. This is the worst one of all because it has nothing to do with tourism. This is a card for people living in the Philippines long-term. There’s no reason for a tourist to get one. And I don’t even get this card. I paid for it, but they won’t issue one. They said that it takes up to three months to issue this card. And yet this extension is only for two months. And I’d have to return to Tacloban to pick it up. My sense was that they had no intention of even submitting the application for my ACR card. All my questions about it were met with vague replies. The main thing I was concerned about was that at some point, an official was going to ask to see my ACR card. Anyone staying in the Philippines beyond 2 months has to get one. So won’t they ask to see it when I leave the country? Apparently, all I will have to do is show the receipt. I have to demonstrate that I have paid for the card. Actually getting and having the card is just a detail. As long as they have their money, they’re happy. Giving me the card I paid for is not such a big concern apparently.

There’s also the Monthly Extension Fee followed almost immediately by the Monthly Extension Application Fee. What is the difference between these two? I have to both pay the extension fee and pay for the privilege of applying to pay this fee.

Finally, there is the real kicker: the Express Lane Fee. This implies that there is a non-express lane. And, of course, there isn’t. Everyone has to pay for express service even though no such thing exists. There is only one service available. And, here too, you find that there is an Express Lane Certification Fee on top of the Express Lane Fee. What could that possibly be? No idea. I paid for 4 certificates, but I didn’t receive any of them. If this is any indication of the efficiency of government in the Philippines, then I don’t know what to think.

On the bright side, I can’t possibly complain about the service I received. They were extremely friendly and accommodating at the immigration office here in Tacloban. I showed up at the end of the day just minutes before they were scheduled to close on a Friday afternoon, and they processed my visa extension right on the spot. I’m fairly certain that there isn’t a country in the world that would have done the same. And I complained about the express service fee. Yet, even though there is no such thing as a non-express service option, I got express service. No question about that. Of course, as I left I was thinking that it was only right that I got such good and fast service. For $184, one would expect nothing less.

Onced I got my visa extension, I still had to find a place to stay. I don’t have the energy to go into all the details, but I went around and around and around the city looking for a place only to be turned away everywhere. I finally returned to a place that seemed somewhat friendly and asked them if they could help me locate a room somewhere. The woman there was very nice – though extremely vague and confused – and made some phone calls. On her fifth call, she found a place with a room. It was a bit expensive at 700 pesos a night, but I was in no position to be choosy at that point. I said that I would take it and I set off on the forty minutes of wandering around that was necessary to try to find it.

I’m sure there is a language problem at work here, but there is also a general logic problem or something. No matter how I tackled this woman who helped me about where this hotel was located, she would not tell me. She knew this place very well and knew what street it was on. Everyone knows, she told me. Just ask! But I was asking! I was asking her. But no matter how many times I asked and how many different ways I phrased the question, she would not tell me the name of the street the hotel was on. She insisted I didn’t need to know. All I had to do was go “that way” and then ask other people for the “Your Home Pensione”. I eventually gave up on asking her and I set off on my bike. I did as she instructed me and asked everyone about the “Your Home Pensione”, but no one knew about it. I cycled around and around and around and got more and more frustrated. I was seconds away from going back to the first hotel and trying once more to convince the woman to tell me the name of the street. No idea why it was a secret. Just then, I had to cycle through the middle of a street basketball game. The kids all shouted and laughed and called out, “Hey, Joe! Where are you going?” So I stopped and said I was going to the “Your Home Pensione.” Did they know where it was? To my amazement, they did know! I happened to be right around the corner from the place and I found it easily.

It turned out to be a big place and very nice. It was a big orange 3-story building with a wide courtyard for vehicles. I got room 21, up on the third floor naturally, but it was easy to carry up my bags. And I could lock my bike up down below. The compound was gated and had a full-time security guard with a huge guard dog – a mastiff, I think. My room was big with two double beds and had a nice bathroom and a TV and air conditioning. I didn’t want or need any of these things, but since I was paying for it, I took advantage of it and did a lot of relaxing. I rode around Tacloban the next day exploring and now that the stress of my arrival was over, I really started to enjoy myself.

Tacloban is a very pleasant city in many ways with a nice waterfront, an interesting harbor, and a crazy busy market. I got my laundry done (for the first time in 2 months, I might add) and got some money from an ATM. My heart is in my mouth every time I use an ATM. I have no confidence in them and I imagine that my card information and PIN is being siphoned off in a dozen ways and that evil people are draining my bank account. Then when I get my money, I realize that the evil people draining my bank account are the bankers themselves. They pile on so many fees at so many levels that it costs a fortune. I hate banks. Doesn’t everyone? They use our money to make investments so they can make a profit. Then they charge us fees for the privilege of lending them our money. I have to pay a fee to my bank in Canada, a foreign exchange fee, and then I have to pay a 200-peso fee to the bank in the Philippines. Everyone says that to reduce the fees you pay, you should withdraw as much as possible at one time. Makes sense, but of course the evil bankers don’t let you. You can only withdraw 10,000 pesos per transaction at ATMs in the Philippines. Why? So the banks can maximize their fees and screw us out of more money of course. I really hate banks and governments with their endless fees.

 

 

Tags: bike, Express Lane Fee, Philippines Bike Trip 2013, tourist visa, visa, visa extension